Mika's Heart.

Suicide.

2010-02-06T16:45:00.000-08:00

I will never forget what Winona Ryder's character said at the end of the book "Girl, Interupted". It was something to the effect of.... after you survive a suicide attempt you realize how silly trying to take your own life is.

A few days ago one of my first cousins tried to commit suicide by shooting himself in the face. Thank God he survived and is in stable condition...

But I cant help but wonder if he feels silly or ridiculous for what he did.

Well, I've never been more scared in my life as I was when I first got the call...couldnt stop crying and shaking.

As a person with excellent coping skills; I have no idea how to deal with this.

♥...

The Randomness:

2010-01-22T08:31:00.000-08:00

Another poem written by my Resident Poet. He wrote this for me back in September, I've been saving it until now, enjoy.

The Randomness

Nothing in life is coincidental
No chance encounters
Or lucky breaks
It has nothing to do with
The stars being aligned
Or astrological signs
Or the moon being full
Or Venus’ gravitational pull
The Randomness of it all
Draws these conclusions for us
It’s not Déjà vu
Its history repeating itself
Destiny being recycled anew

Neither life nor death
Is left up to happenstance
The heart sustains loves and losses
And the memories of them
Are forged into the fibers
Of eternity
To be resurrected
At an appointed time
What we consider random
Has already been predestined
Life’s conquests and defeats
The people we lose
And the people we meet
Are cyclical and deliberate

I already know you
You were mine in a previous life
We bathed together in the Nile
And ate figs
As we dried
Under the sun
We gazed up at the stars
Over the Serengeti
And used them to map
The course of our lives
We danced by the fire
The embers turned
Your skin to bronze
We told stories that our
Ancestors have given us
Of creation, of kings and queens,
Of destiny and love
Life itself was
Made manifest through you
You gave birth to the mountains
And the oceans spilled from your womb
You are everything that
Is perfect within us
You ARE Creation
You ARE Beauty
The Randomness is an illusion
We are all connected
Through space and time
And I know you
Then and now.

9/6/09

~Mr. Mc Flyy

Earthquake In Haiti: Get Involved!

2010-01-13T08:53:00.000-08:00

So, I've been quite busy and havent posted anything in a long while. However, I felt it was very necessary to take a quick moment to send my love and regards to those affected by the earthquake in Haiti. Equally as important I need to pass on some information to you in reards to helping the victims. Please do what you can even if it means simply passing this information along to others. That truly goes a long way. Thanks so much. (Please excuse grammatical errors, I composed this in a rush so that I could post immediately).

Here we go,

Partners In Health. Its Port-au-Prince clinical director , Louise Ivers, has appealed for assistance: "Port-au-Prince is devastated... lots of deaths. SOS. SOS... Please help us"
A temporary field hospital is in need of supplies, pain meds, bandages.

The very reputable UNICEF has issued a statement that "Children are always the most vulnerable population in any natural disaster, and UNICEF is there for them." UNICEF requests donations for relief for children in Haiti via their Haiti Earthquake Fund. You can also call 1-800-4UNICEF.

Mercy Corps is sending an emergency team to fulfill immediate needs. They helped tremendously in the earthquakes of Peru in 2007, China & Pakistan in 2008 and Indonesia last year. Call 1888.256.1900 to make a donation.

Doctors Without Borders. I've always been fascinated by this organization and what they do. They are already on the ground treating victims. Please click on the link to donate any amount you can.

Ben Stiller's Stillerstrong campaign will be temporarily diverting all donations to support the Haiti relief effort.

Oxfam is rushing in teams from around the region to respond to the situation to provide clean water, shelter, sanitation and help people recover. You can also Donate to Oxfam America online.

And of course, Recording Artist Wyclef who is a native of Haiti and Ambassador to the country is collecting donations through his foundation Yele Haiti. Text "Yele" to 501501 and $5 will be charged to your phone bill and given to relief projects through the organization. I've done this already, you should too!

Peace,
Mika

My Prayer For Pakistan.

2009-10-28T10:31:00.000-07:00

Dear God, when is the Violence going to end?

I'm getting tired of us hurting and killing each other.

Can't we do better???

If these images are not enough to finally SAY NO TO VIOLENCE then, I don't know what is!

Please show us the way to Peace, Tolerance, Compassion & Empathy...For Our Children's sake.

Amen.

(pictures, Associated Press)

Thank You For Visiting This Blog!

2009-10-22T20:14:00.001-07:00

I get so many hits on this blog from all over the world and I really appreciate all of you. Hello Saudi Arabia, India, Mauritius, Saint George, London, Nigeria, Canada and the USA! I see all of you (sorry, if I forgot someone).

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR VISITING!

Send me a message or comment anytime.

♥Love♥, Mika

Donate A Coat! (or 2)

2009-10-20T13:07:00.001-07:00

For the past 8 years I've been participating in the NYcares Coat Drive by donating used coats to those in need. I'd like to encourage you all to do the same. If you have any coats that you don't wear or know anyone who has coats they would like to giveaway please do so.

Its quite simple; you can drop the coats off at a designated place, which is usually a police/fire department or a clothing store. Sometimes the clothing store will have giveaways for your donation (like 10% off a purchase).

You can find a list of participating Organizations in your area HERE.

Thank you to all my "Future Philanthropists" and "Humanitarians at Heart"!

~Mika (Impossible is Nothing)

Introducing: My Resident Poet!

2009-10-05T19:57:00.000-07:00

So you guys know what happens when I find out someone has a wonderful talent or strength right? Yes of course, I put them to work! With all the "deep" issues and concerns of the world that I explore in this blog, including poverty, hate, violence and racism; I'd like to began highlighting the true foundation of this blog which is LOVE & PEACE! I asked my "twittercrush" to be my "Resident Poet" and he agreed! (Which means that he will post a new poem here, once a month) I think he's a great writer and poet. I'm sure you will agree...enjoy!

My Melody

You are my melody
Playing in the sweetest key
Pulling my heart strings
Your love’s playing a symphony
The thought of you makes me smile
The joy you bring is my everything
A song just for us
Is playing in my mind

There is a song my heart sings
Accompanied by woodwinds and strings
The key it’s in I’m not really sure
But I know the melody
It’s like something Stevie brings
Lay back and enjoy Love’s Overture
A song that lovers compose
Making Love. Making Music.
Climax. Crescendo.
Conductor. Soloist.
Contrasts and compliments
A perfect blend of instruments
Our bodies create a symphony
I can hear the music in my mind

You are my melody
Playing in the sweetest key
Pulling my heart strings
Your love’s playing a symphony
The thought of you makes me smile
The joy you bring is my everything
A song just for us
Is playing in my mind

Aligned in a rhythmic regiment
Intertwined in Devious Decadence
The Sweetest Sin
Pleasure and pain all at the same time
Our hearts beat in perfect cadence
Bated breath exhales in syncopated staccato
The Opus of an Angel
Ethereal harmonies invade
My stream of consciousness
I don’t want this song to ever end
Will you play with me forever?
An endless Nocturne with lust, with love, with fury
Or is this a transient affair,
A preview for my soul to see
What could have been?
I pray not the latter
Be my melody everlastingly
Making Love. Making Music.
Eternally, I hear the music in my mind.

Written By, Mr. Mcflyy

www.twitter.com/martymcflyy
Follow him on Twitter!

Ignorance At Its Finest:

2009-10-02T20:34:00.000-07:00

I am really not shocked at this story...I am more disappointed and disgusted than anything else. Watch the video...

I use to attend this University! It is one of the most diverse schools in New York. The student body is about 60% Asian (including South, East and Western Asia) Yes, I agree with Freedom of Speech BUT I just don't understand Proud Displays of Ignorance.
SMDH!

Lets Discuss, what do you think? Leave a comment.
~Mika

This weeks G.I.F! (Get Involved Feature)

2009-09-29T08:16:00.000-07:00

The fatal beating of the Chicago teen, Derrion Albert has touched the entire world. This morning when I logged onto the computer, it was great and refreshing to see a Trending Topic on Twitter called #Stoptheviolence, BUT before I knew it, there was another Trending Topic: #teachaniggatuesdays.

Yes, I know what you're thinking...but that's a topic for another blog post.

For this weeks G.I.F (Get Involved Feature) I am asking that everyone who cares about what happened and who is concerned about violence (especially among the youth and black people) to get involved and do something.

I started a small project with my students, they are writing letters, making cards, writing poems, drawing pictures etc. that express sympathy for Albert , his family and the community in Chicago where he is from. I will send all of them to the Director of the community center where it happened and the family of, Derrion Albert. My students have already started on theirs and it would be great if YOU could participate in this effort. It can be a short poem, a drawing, a letter, a song- just please participate so that we can show our empathy/sympathy for what has happened and stand up against violence. You may email it to me or send it in the mail, if necessary.

If you have any questions or concerns feel free to email me sweetfryer@gmail.com.

Thanks so much guys!

Please Remember, "Impossible Is NOTHING!"

~Mika

Mayor Daley, on his way to Copenhagen to push for the 2016 Olympics to Chicago, issued a statement asking Chicagoans to "destroy the code of silence that protects criminals."
"It only promotes the kind of violence that has taken this young man from us," the statement read. "We're all in this together. We must save our children." source

Video of Chicago Teen Beaten To Death:

2009-09-28T20:15:00.000-07:00

In Chicago, a 16 year old student was beaten to death outside of a community center. He was an innocent bystander trying to break up a fight...as a mother, of a son, this really saddens me. As a Humanitarian, I am so concerned about our world...

My Condolences,
Mika

Featured Blogger: 8thLight

2009-09-05T20:33:00.000-07:00

8thLight from "The Essentials of Cool" Blog is my current Featured Blogger. I'd describe 8thLight as Resourceful, Geeky (his words not mine) and Cool, with a capital C! He's Uber smart and has a lot of information to share. In addition to all those lovely things he paid me to say about him (LOL :-P )-He and I have a lot in common. We're both bloggers and we are both lovers of Black culture. We are especially dedicated to trying to understand the Black Family (or lack there of). These factors have resulted in many conversations and debates about this and countless other topics. Although many times we were forced to "agree to disagree" I really value and respect his opinion... I asked him to put together a list of 5 sites that Black people should know about, bookmark or visit. After what feels like years of waiting here it is:

Hello everyone,

Mika thought it would be a nice idea if I did a guest blog. Sadly, due to my procrastination I'm just now putting my fingers to keys. :-/

She wanted to know what are some of my favorite blogs/sites that I feel Black people should know about or bookmark. Mika didn't need them to be sites ran by Black people, but I figured why not go all the way with it. In for a dime, in for a dollar. I decided to stay away from the really obvious ones that everyone talks about. So without further delay here are my 5 in no particular order:

1. This So-Called Post-Post Racial Life

Webmistress, PPR Scribe examines race, race relations & culture in the age of Obama. As the name of the blog suggests, she takes a critical look at this thing called "Post-Racial America" and what, if anything, it means.

We are not (if we were ever) “beyond race.” But we may be beyond that moment where (some) of us (not me, though) thought we might be beyond race or at least headed in that direction.

She describes herself as, "a journalist reporting from the racial front", and I couldn't agree more.

2. Keeping Up With The Huxtables

I happened to find this gem through pure luck. When I first stumbled upon the blog, I wasn't sure if it was for me. The title appealed to me, but with it's Black Greek vibe I didn't know if it had anything to offer for me.

I consider myself more of an everyman. I'm definitely far closer to a Roc Emerso n than Raoc-A-Fella so the life of Jack & Jill members, AKA's and anything else that screams Black upper middle class is definitely alien territory for me. But The Socialite manages to touch on current events impacting the Black community, fashion, social gatherings and life tips from the perspective of upwardly mobile Blacks.

3. Black Web 2.0

Simply put, Black Web 2.0 takes a look at social media, some of the faces behind some of our favorite sites & products as well as the internet's impact on popular culture (and vice versa) industry news all through the lens of Black culture and experiences.

Sample topics include:

Why were minorities late to accessing social media sites like Facebook?

BET Awards Dominate Twitter, Causes Racist Backlash

Race And The Web: Going After Niche Markets Or Practicing Digital Segregation?

Founder, Angela Benton has definitely put together what I consider, a must see site.

4. Black And Married With Kids

This site is ran by Lamar & Ronnie Tyler, a married couple from the D.C. area. Their blog has tons of advice on parenting, blended families and relationships. Their site is a true labor of love.

5. Co-Parenting 101

Co-Parenting 101 takes a look at similar issues to the previous blog, but from the perspective of managing a divorce or break up while still being the best mother & father possible to your children. Deesha Philyaw along with her ex-husband Michael Thomas (both currently living in Pittsburgh) collect information and opinions on anything and everything that Exes with children have to face.

Well, I hope you find these sites informative and entertaining.

Thanks for stopping by,

8thlight
The Essentials of Cool

Hurricane Katrina, its been 4 years.

2009-08-30T12:39:00.000-07:00

This weekend is the 4 year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. It seems like yesterday that it happened and everything is still fresh in my mind. Images in the media of infants without milk and diapers; the sadness in their parents eyes. It was mostly my people...those that shared my skin tone who were helpless and desperate.

Best wishes for the rehabilitation of New Orleans; special acknowledgment to those people who are still there volunteering and rebuilding. I hope that one day all of the natives will be able to return home to the vibrant, exciting New Orleans that we all remember.

My deepest sympathy to all the lives that were lost...I will never forget.

~Mika

This weeks Get Involved Feature! (G.I.F)

2009-08-28T19:27:00.000-07:00

Being immobile is one of the most difficult things in the world; especially if you weren't born that way. Having to rely on others to do basically everything for you can feel degrading and devastating. I know this first hand because I was bound to a wheelchair for four months, after a bicycle accident. The accident itself was VERY traumatic but going from an independent woman to depending on everyone else was even more traumatic for me.

But even still I was very blessed and fortunate, to have a wheelchair; it might seem trivial but it means so much.

Many people in this world can't afford and don't have a wheelchair to move around. As a result they can't work or go to school...I'm sure you can imagine the affects of this. No work leads to no money, which leads to no food to eat and survive...so on and so forth. Recently, I saw on television grown men and women, walking on their hands and knees (yes, like an animal) because they have no other way to get around.

The Wheelchair Foundation provides wheelchairs to those in need. Help me spread the word! Tell everyone about this unique relief mission. By spreading the word, more and more people will join the fight against immobility. Also, if you have a used or new wheelchair that is not being used you can donate it to The Wheelchair Foundation, they will come to pick it up from you. I donated mine!

Educate yourself. http://www.wheelchairfoundation.org/

LOVE, Mika

Skateboarding in Afghanistan

2009-08-20T09:17:00.000-07:00

This is an amazing story out of Afghanistan that really brought me to tears. Amidst all the negative things that are going on there these days some children still have a way to enjoy themselves in a safe, positive environment. Afghanistan is a country where public displays of emotion is almost never seen and essentially unheard of and unacceptable. Laughter, Dancing, Happiness is virtually banned in the public especially for women. It's very rare and socially unacceptable for a young girl to play a sport or simply play and talk among friends, especially young boys in public.

Which is why this story is so special.

"Skateistan" is a co-educational skateboarding school in Afghanistan, bringing people together to learn how to skate. (Lower the music), Watch, Enjoy, Discuss. ~Mika

Rwanda Today: A Fairytale?

2009-08-11T17:23:00.000-07:00

The story of Rwanda's history was re-enacted on the big screen in 2004 (Hotel Rwanda) but what's happening in Rwanda today is even better than a movie and more like a dream...
I love CNN, and I depend on them to keep me abreast with whats going on in the World. On Sunday afternoon's, I watch "GPS with Fareed Zakaria", on a episode I watched last month, he interviewed Paul Kagame, the President of Rwanda.

Mr. Kagame discussed how the Rwandan citizens are repairing the pain and hurt inflicted by the genocide in 1994. Today, the citizens are living among each other and trying to mend what happened 15 years ago; many people are neighbors with folks who killed their loved ones during the genocide.

There is even a structured program that focuses on allowing the Rwandans to work together with a common goal of forgiving and moving forward as one nation. According to Mr. Kagame it is effective and is working very well.
My first thoughts of this "agenda", if you will-were that of optimism and hope. I am now torn and don't know if I am 100% convinced that this will continue to work and if it's "really realistic" (no pun intended). Although Rwanda is (now) one of Africa's most stable countries, In my opinion the thought of "bringing victims and perpetrators back together" is Amazing...BUT it's implementation is a bit of a fairytale/dream.

What do you think?

*To view the interview with President Kagame click here.*

Good News: Impossible is Nothing!

2009-08-05T17:37:00.000-07:00

Did you hear?! Euna Lee and Laura Ling have been released from a North Korea Prison. Now imagine if all the falsely accused prisoners not just Americans, this includes Iraqis, Pakistanis, Africans, South Americans- everyone were released...
Now, I KNOW FOR SURE, there is hope for anything. Just 2 months ago as I signed the petition for their release I honestly thought there was no hope in their favor. Kudos to those of us who signed the petition and are making other efforts for humanity!
This was truly a miracle. Thank You God.

Click Here For more on the story

Remember, other people around the world still need OUR help...
Click Here to Take Action AND
do your part for the women of Nicaragua!

Thank you!
Love, Mika

Just Some Thoughts of an Unconventional Thinker...

2009-07-31T19:41:00.000-07:00

or an over-zealous, peace-loving dreamer??? You tell me...

Last week as I sat in the park and my students played, I began to write down things for a potential blog post. At this moment I have no idea where my son put the book that I wrote it in but I will try to remember what i wrote and convey the message that I was trying to send. Honestly, I don't know what I was really trying to say...of course, I have an idea but well, perhaps you all can help. This string of thoughts all really started earlier this month. I went to the 18th birthday party (on the 4th of July) of Dakota, a young lady who is a close family friend. I've known her for many years and was a sort of a mentor to her as she was growing up. Her mom an Artistic Director is my former acting, dance and singing teacher. The fact that she is now 18 and I've known her since she was 6 years old kinda overwhelmed me. As I gathered her birthday gift (an assortment of handmade jewelry and a beautiful vintage watch- I have all sorts of things like this around my apartment because I love and collect them). And I must add, it was a gift that she could totally appreciate because she has an eccentric, unique style. Needless to say, she loved it. I was thinking to myself how time flies and I can't believe she is 18! and...how old does that make me?! :)

Anyway, we (my son, my sister and myself) arrived at the picnic-party and Dakota was beautiful as ever. As, I was getting fruit from the table she tapped me on the shoulder to get my attention. She then introduced me to her boyfriend, It was quite surprising and sweet because I remember her as this little girl, not at all interested in boys; also, the way it happened was so respectful and polite like- I was her auntie; a person she respected, loved and cherished. He extended his arm to shake my hand and it was a pleasant and honorable experience. Later on, as I was about to leave, Dakota's grandmother started to tell me how I was very influential in Dakota's life. That I was always a positive role model for her and helped create the wonderful young lady she is today. Wow! that was alot and really shocked me. She also said she remembers when Dakota use to sit on my lap as a little girl and talk to me and ask me billions of questions; how I was so patient with her. Once again, I was honored, even more than before. Dakota graduated high school and went to prom last month. Heres a picture of her on prom night:

Now, fast forward to sitting in the park last week. It amazed me how the children played among each other; color of skin having no existence. Difference of religion oblivious. They just enjoyed each other's presence. A dark skin girl wearing the latest air jordans and a light brown girl; head covered in a black hijab ran into the park together giggling and gossiping. An asian teacher held the hand of a hispanic student and lead him to the bench where she put a bandaid on his knee...

Children seem to be the most honest and tolerant people on earth. This is not news to me but it is so refreshing to witness; it gives me hope. Perhaps adults will one day be able to be empathetic and tolerant of others race, religion, gender, views, lifestyles etc. Watching the children of different backgrounds play games with each other in the park, put a smile on my face; it did not matter to them that they were different from each other. I know some teachers that treat their students in a certain way because they are "different".On the other hand, children are very good at doing the total opposite. They are accepting of all people regardless of differences. In the times that we are living in where racial and religious tensions are so high, all over the world; it makes me happy that there is still some love left, within our children. There is also much Imagination and Innocence that we adults lack at times. Dakota was no different, she too didn't notice or seem to care that we had different skin colors.

Children just need nurturing and loving adults in their life who are themselves kind and caring. With that they can grow up to be loving, responsible adults who are not prejudice or hateful. They are born with the willingness to be just that; all they need is the correct guidance of their caregivers. This would give us a chance to erase the hate that human-beings have toward each other. I still have hope that Peace and Tolerance is attainable IN MY LIFETIME. If not, I hope and pray that our children will be able to see it in theirs...but it must start with us adults. As a person who loves to observe the behaviors of people and how they interact in public, I appreciate and love when and how people of different races, religions, ethnics etc. be-friend, help and try to understand each other. It seems I have an eye for noticing such things. It is even more hopeful when I see children do it because it is truly pure and genuine. In a perfect world, I'd love that we all can be able to do this; as an adult I know that nothing is perfect but perhaps we can **commit to attempting to understand each other...and then maybe- peace...well it might seem far-fetched, but I won't give up; for the sake of my own child, my students and all the children of the world.
**WILL YOU COMMIT TO THIS? PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT...

2009-07-16T18:30:00.001-07:00

This is a beautiful and breathtaking image. The vibrant and colorful clothing of these black women truly give a since of Elegance and Excitement!

Feed the Hungry! Get Involved Feature (G.I.F)

2009-07-15T19:32:00.000-07:00

We all know that there are billions of people dying from hunger around the globe, at the same time we should also be aware that you don't have to be poor or homeless to be hungry. There are plenty of children and families around the world living in working-class communities and homes and still they are hungry. Lets help feed and nourish them. At www.thehungersite.com you can do just that. It's very simple, click your mouse and just like that you can provide food for someone. I'd like to encourage you to bookmark the website or add it to your favorites and visit at least twice a day. Please pass this along to all your friends. To all my "Humanitarians at Heart" and "Future Philanthropists", THANK YOU!
Love, Mika

This Weeks G.I.F! (Get Involved Feature)

2009-06-24T08:19:00.000-07:00

Can you imagine being newly married pregnant and happy- until your family tells you to get rid of your husband; they don't like the guy. Then they go to court and get you a divorce. WTF?! Thats crazy! Yeah, I know. This is what happened to Fatima Bent Suleiman Al Azzaz, a Computer Instructor in Saudi Arabia. Her half-brothers decided her marriage was over; and the union disolved in 2005, marking one of the first cases of "forced divorce". When Fatima and her husband refused to split, she was sent to prison. Fatima 35, is out now, stepping up her fight to get back her man.
This is where we come in. if you'd like to support Fatimas Case...Send a fax to:
His Majesty, King Abdullah bin Abdul
Aziz Al Saud,
Kingdom of Saudi Arabia at 011-966-1-491-2726.

Saudi women hang out at a mall in Riyadh. Under the strict Saudi interpretation of Islam, women must be fully covered in public and are not allowed to drive or vote. Wives need their husbands’ permission to leave the country. photo, EPA. article By Jeffrey Fleishman, Los Angeles Times Staff Writer January 14, 2008

Urgent Call for Annulment of Marriage of 10-Year-Old Girl!

Amneh Mohamed Sharahili, a 10-year-old Saudi schoolgirl, has been married off by her father to a 25-year-old Saudi man. Although Amneh’s marriage contract was established in mid-February 2009, she has not yet been handed over to her husband and currently she live with her parents. Her father plans to give her away next month, July 2009! Amneh, is eager to continue school and eventually become a teacher (like me) :) and does not quite understand what it means to be married. NATURALLY! duh?! sorry.
However, she does feel different from her classmates saying “while they will become teachers and doctors, I do not know what my fate and future will be other than being married since I was 10 years old.”
Please write to the King of Saudi Arabia asking him to issue an edict establishing a minimum age of marriage and banning all child marriages. Call upon him to take urgent action to annul the marriage of Amneh and all other child brides whose marriage contracts have been executed, but who have yet to be handed over to their husbands. Also ask him to ensure that child brides already living with their husbands are given a real choice to annul their marriages and, if they opt for annulment, to ensure that this happens swiftly without negative repercussions on the girls.
Send Letters to:
His Majesty, King Abdullah bin AbdulAziz Al Saud Kingdom of Saudi Arabia
Fax: 011+966 1 491 2726

His Excellency Dr. Muhammad bin Abdul El Karim Abdul Azziz El Issa Minister of Justice
University Street, Riyadh 11137
Kingdom of Saudi Arabia
Fax: +966 1 401 1741

With a copy to:
The Human Rights Commission
P.O. Box 58889
Riyadh 11515
King Fahed Street Building
373 Riyadh Kingdom of Saudi Arabia

If you have trouble (need stamps or postage, dont know what to write) send the letters via email to me sweetfryer@gmail.com and I will send it out for you. You can find sample letters here and more information about each case. http://www.equalitynow.org/

Thank you to all my "Humanitarians at Heart" and "Future Philanthropists". ;)
~Mika

*Image courtesy of Jeff Jacoby, The Boston Globe*

Introducing G.I.F... (Get Involved Feature)!

2009-06-23T08:53:00.000-07:00

For all my readers and followers who are "Humanitarians at Heart" and "Future Philanthropists", I want to encourage you to Get Involved Today and start Changing the World. Each week I will post a G.I.F (Get Involved Feature). This will be an opportunity for you to Get Involved, Take Action and let your Voice Be Heard. Stay Tuned for this weeks G.I.F! ~Mika

Traditional Yoruba Wedding Engagement Ceremony

2009-06-10T18:46:00.000-07:00

Words and pictures by OLOLADE ADEWUYI.

For the Yoruba, marriage is more than just a union between a man and his wife; it is a union between the families of both couple. It is common for families to do a background investigation into the history of prospective spouses of their wards before they agree to allow such wards to go into the sacred institution of marriage. There’s nothing more sacred among the Yoruba of South Western Nigeria than marriage. After all is done and the two families accept that their children can go ahead and marry their chosen love interest, preparations begin in earnest for the big day.
Depending on the religion of the two families, they can choose to do it one way or the other. For the purpose of this study, I have chosen a wedding between two Christian families. Religion among the Yoruba is not very important. Unlike among other racial nationalities, religion has not been able to create a huge chasm among the Yoruba of different faiths. According to JDY Peel, a professor of history at the SOAS, London, who has studied religion among the Yoruba, the main core of Yoruba existence has been held together by a common secularity which has shaped their philosophy into four beliefs: owo, omo, alaafia ati ilosiwaju being wealth, children, health and prosperity. Hence, Yoruba people are least likely to fight over religion like most other people would. It is common in Yoruba land to find married couples practicing different religions i.e. Muslim husband and Christian wife and vice versa. But this is not about religion so we’ll go back to the wedding.
After agreeing on the wedding date and venue, this time for a Christian wedding, there are usually two ceremonies. There is the traditional wedding which usually comes up a day before the church or registry wedding as the couple may desire. It is usually held in the residence of the bride’s family with the groom’s family invited to come and make their claim for the bride.
I shall attempt to explain via the following images:

It is traditional for the bride’s family to request some items as part of the dowry for the bride. These may include yam tubers, clothing items, assorted drinks, bag of salt, fruits and sundry other times that the family may request for. This can be an endless list but there’s usually an agreement between both families to the extent and cost of what may be required. On the day of the ceremony, the women in the groom’s family bring these items and set it up in front of the venue for all to see, ostensibly to show the public that they are capable of the task of undertaking the business of marrying a wife for their son.

Like I said previously, a Yoruba wedding involves both families so when the parents of the groom arrive they greet their hosts, the bride’s parents, in all humility, by kneeling down in the case of women and lying prostrate in the case of the men. It is a show of good faith between both families. It in no way belittles any of the parties, rather, it ennobles them and shows their strength of culture and character. They in turn are well received by the bride’s parents with joy and laughter.

After the activity to receive the groom’s family is completed inside, the groom, who must have been waiting outside with his friends, is then summoned into the ceremony. Accompanied by his friends and the sound of gangan, traditional Yoruba talking drums, he saunters into the ceremony with all aplomb ready to meet his new family. According to Lagbaja, a popular masked Nigerian musician, “in Africa the most propelling things are the drums and the beats; we are about beats and grooves”.

Wait a minute! Lest I forget, there’s some money involved in all this. At every step of the way, the groom has to show he is capable of taking care of his bride to be, by showing some signs of affluence. In Yoruba culture, the women of the house, that is, the bride’s, have to be compensated by the groom for taking away their jewel. Hence, he has to show them some form of appreciation for the care they have given her all through the years by putting some money alongside his friends in their common purse. That explains the shiny aluminum bowls. He has to do this with joy.

When the groom finally arrives in the presence of his in laws, he is required to humble himself before them to receive blessings. He therefore prostrates himself as they pray over him.

The bride is finally brought out from her room by her friends who dance with her rejoicing at the coming of her day. She is veiled to hide her shyness but soon removes the veil. Before this, a letter introducing the groom’s family and their mission would have been read to all and sundry by a member of the bride’s family. Observe the constant drummer; there is music every step of the way.

From the depth of their hearts, the bride’s parents send her off with prayer. This sometimes takes a long period of time as the parents know that this will be the last time they can hold their daughter as theirs for in a few moments she’ll be somebody’s wife.

For one last time she sits on their lap as they all look on with blood shot eyes. It’s an awkward moment for she’ll be gone into the arms of her new family soon.

The bride is received into the arms of her parent in-laws who pray fervently for her, blessing her as she comes into their household.

After all is said and done, both of them finally dance into each other’s arms. From sounds courtesy of the constant drummer, the groom begins spraying his bride with currency notes, a traditional thing among many Nigerian nationalities, to show his affluence and his ability to care for her. It also is a method for rewarding the graceful dance steps of the bride.
The traditional marriage process in Yoruba land is a type of coming of age ceremony. Many young people look forward to it with glee. It is one of the most beautiful spectacles in the world.

Welcome Everyone!

2009-06-08T16:03:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone! Thanks for stopping by this blog. I have so many wonderful things in store, so make sure you stay tuned. I hope this blog can be the beginning of big things- In essence, I want it to unify and glorify the human race.... no matter what race, religion, ethnicity etc. you come from! WELCOME!!!
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Respectfully, Mika xoxo

Look At My Locks

2009-03-26T23:05:00.000-07:00

When i think about my locks, alot comes to mind.

Like back lot ways when I was a wee me.
I remember, believing that "dreadlocks" were God sent...that some people were born to have their hair tangle and be comb resistant like yardies' are.I believed that. But like a mole, big on a face, locks were condemned
"It isnt everything that he made, that is beautiful, you know."
You know?
Let me tell you,I had a cousin that I believed had dreadlocks that were God sent.He had them till his parents decided that if they were to cut it, God would get a hint. Somehow, they may've been right because at 20, his hair isnt locked anymore.The dreads never made it back.
So why was it that when I got here, left backhome for the lighter sands,I got to meet this one Jamaican sista...who laughed and said;
"You're so silly, MadSoul. Dreads arent natural, no one is ever born with them, they are grown".
And being a teenager, I believed.How dare I not?After all, she must know.She was Jamaican.And you' d always hear about those "dreadlock" folks...the ones taken aboard as slaves...the damaged ones...who didnt quite make it....uncivilized they are...with long dreadlocks...that they would not cut.
I often wonder...what makes them so different from us?

Now. If you're like me, you're probably guessing that this is about hair.
But I'll be honest with you, I myself, am not so sure.

Though today, I do find myself remembering why I dared to revert back to dreads.

I got tired, you know...of being made to feel unpretty. By myself. By my people. By their people. By humans.
It gets to a point where you realize that although you maybe ugly, you are exhausted, trying to be pretty.You get comfortable within the background, close to the floor, somewhere in the corner. You dare to care. I dont know if its some wealth of boldness...courage... lack of confidence? What it is, I do not know.But I know, I did ge there.

I remember my old hair...Ohhhh It flowed! Oh so it flowed. ......And when the wind blows, I love that it'd attempt to chase it.And when I'd click clack it down the hall I'd love that it bounce.
And boys?White men saw me.And I didnt see the nigger reflection in their eyes.
And black men saw me.And likewise, I looked like I was sophisticated.Oh black men saw me!And I didnt see the nigger reflection in their eyes.

Long flowy hair.Especially in its darkest forms.
Thin! Bone straight! Curly and Full!I'd pay a hundred dollars for two packs of-
-Glamorous.
Because I wanted that.
And since it was said to be the best human haid brand i made sure i'd get my-
-Sensationel.
Because I wanted that.
That look...the one everyone sought after.I wanted that.And I had it.
But ironically, the remedy failed me. I'd always felt Beautifully.Unreal. And ever so inadequate.
Somehow, I could never get it right.But even then, it was safer than having my naps out in the wind.
So..."baby, dont touch ma hair"."Dont you know you never touch a black woman's hair?""Sugar, dont pull my hair"Insecurities filled my pores...my follicles felt loose and I'd be scared.
You'd often hear of girls getting their weaves pulled out in fights and that was the worst sh*t that could happen.I laugh i laugh at the irony of it all!First, it was that we competed to have the best white hair.Then it was shameful to have it revealed to the world that your hair was fake white hair.Who in God's name are we fooling?We confuse the black folks. We confuse the white folks. No one seems to know what real is anymore! So much so that one said to me the other day as she pointed to my locks..."Is your hair real?".
And if you were to have natural hair, you'd be seen as a black girl...because normal black girls dont have black hair. So you must be Afrocentric to keep your hair.
So! If i decide to be me. It must be because I am pro black (Yes I am. And yes you're wrong).

The whole situation is disheartening.

So now I am locked.And like the saying goes,... "and loving it".

Most people do not ask me why I chose it.I guess because
they already know.But for the ones who do,I say
"Look at the world.Now, look at me.No. Take a good look at this world.Now, look at me."

I am locked for a silent revolution.Within me, there is a drive to make right what can never be resolved.I can never touch a child's question, hold it, detangle it and set it right.So the non verbalized communications within her that questions why her mother's shiny hair comes off at night to reveal what looks more like hers, and then responds with some hope of someday, being able to rock some weave, will forever escape me.Far too deep to be noted.Far too late to be informed.
I am locked for a beauty that is undermined.That lies in my curls and stands like ma locks.That reminds me that I had almost forgotten the beauty in nature's individuality.And that long after many sleeps, I can someday look in the mirror and truly believe this beauty.That it is within. But out here too. Right there, staring me in the face, superior to my head. I owe it to these locks to be proud.
I am locked, to stand as a question.To the reason why we often choose to bow.Where most black folks are said to be in debt And poverty seems to be knocking us out cold, some would still choose to buy Prada brand hair...than to go to work without.I am asking this question in hopes that someday, maybe we will see. That together,
we are taller.

Most people do not ask me why I chose it.I guess because they already know.
But for the ones who do,I say
"Look at the world.Look at me.Take a good look at this world.Now. Look at my locks."

***by "Madsoul Sista". Diaryofamadsoul.blogspot.com***

2009-02-17T21:07:00.000-08:00

Let's learn to celebrate our differences and acknowledge our similarities!
-WITH LOVE, MIKA

2009-02-17T20:53:00.000-08:00

On being brought from Africa to America.'TWAS mercy brought me from my Pagan land,Taught my benighted soul to understandThat there's a God, that there's a Saviour too:Once I redemption neither fought now knew,Some view our sable race with scornful eye,"Their colour is a diabolic die."Remember, Christians, Negroes, black as Cain,May be refin'd, and join th' angelic train.
-PHYLLIS WHEATLEY

2009-02-12T22:24:00.000-08:00

BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL!!!

Jamaica

Ivory Coast

Trinidad

South Africa

Tobago

Sudan

Guyana

Ghana

Dominican Republic

Gabon

Barbados

Kenya

Panama

Cuba

Puerto Rico

Senegal

Guinea

India

Congo

Belize

Mali

Bermuda

Burkina Faso

Aruba

Nigeria

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.

They send me to eat in the kitchen

When company comes,

But I laugh,And eat well,And grow strong.

Tomorrow,I'll be at the table

When company comes.

Nobody'll dare say to me,"Eat in the kitchen,"Then.

Besides,They'll see how beautiful I am

And be ashamed--I, too, am America.

-Langston Hughes

ONE LOVE,

Antigua

Martinique

Cameroon

Saint Kitts

Tunisia

Niger

Tanzania

Uruguay

Brasil

Bahamas

Grenada

Saba

South Africa

Montserrat

Bonaire

Cayman Islands

Zambia

Namibia

Botswana

Malawi

Saint Martin

Gaudeloupe

Papa New Guinea

Honduras

Turks & Caicos

Guatemala

CapeVerde

Seychelles
Saint Lucia